[taken from here]

Before I even embark on bringing herself back - and believe me, she and I have discussed this at great length during the last few months - I wanted to just give you a 'status of the muse' and let you know what we have planned. I'm NOT going down that same path that I did three months ago. We both have no qualms over having fun, I mean come on, this is Zee we're talking about here, but the reason we're coming back is to focus more on building her as a character.

So, here's the plan and I apologize if it's lengthy, but this is stuff I've been noting and stewing over since the beginning of January. I'll also cut it to save your f-pages, because I'm a sweetheart that way <3

How much was someone supposed to take? How long before the realism of not dying would kill her mentally, and emotionally? Insanity was only a breathe away. One simple intake of air..

"No, man, you are NOT fucking listening! They know she's alive. It's over, just let her go."

It didn't register. The words she heard didn't click.

"..I don't know where. We'll sedate her, knock her out and drop her somewhere. Someone will find her."

There was a pause, then a need to know what it was that was said but she couldn't get her ears to focus. What was the plan now? Did they agree that it was time to just get rid of her? Was someone out there aware of her existence? So many questions, and nothing or no one to give her the answers.

"Once Monroe finds out, we're both as good as dead. So, we get rid of her now and no one is the wiser."

Time stood still. Paralyzed and still healing, she willed herself to move, to open her eyes, to twitch but nothing. The door to her cell opened, and rather than have the same sadistic greeting as they normally gave, she was met with urgency. Her body was rolled into his cold arms and lifted, carried merely a few feet before turning, causing her stomach to both lurch and spin before dropping out completely. She sensed the other one there, the one that performed most of the tests on her. The one carrying her flopped her arm over, exposing the inside of her elbow exposed . A painless prick bit into her sensitive skin and it was only a matter of time before she fell victim to the unconscious darkness one more.

She dreamed the same thing. The same muted blue vision, the same place, the same face to face meeting with someone she wished she could place, but couldn't. He always told her the same words and in her head she could comprehend it all, smiling with relief after he was finished talking. 

It seemed like lifetimes before she came to. Light penetrated through her closed eyes, making it feel like just another taunting fantasy--one that goaded her specifically this time. So, it wasn't a surprise when she didn't let her dark brown eyes appear. she needed some form of encouragement. 

The light only grew stronger, warming through her pale, blood stained skin until finally her lashes lifted. 
 

 Hi there.

This is most likely going to be the last time I write in this journal for awhile, but I felt it necessary to iron out some things before I shelve it.

There is a few reasons I decided to do this, most of which I won't get into any detail about, but I'll leave you with this:

 

"Do you believe in an afterlife?"

Do I believe in life after death? ....Yeah. Well..maybe my idea isn't like alot of other peoples, but yeah, I do. I believe in memories and that people take those with them to the grave and beyond. Good ones, bad ones. They all find a little place in your brain and get revived when the people that involve them remember. They always do. I remember things about my mother at the most random of times and that makes me smile because it's like at that very moment, she's holding my hand, smiling too.

It is with a heavy heart that I let you all know that I've decided to put Zee into an indefinite hiatus.

following this meeting

Ziyah slipped on a pair of low rise hipster jeans and a loose black blouse before shuffling to the front door to slip into a pair of black pumps. She needed to get out and enjoy the country that she hadn't been back to since before her mother passed almost 8 years earlier. She couldn't even make it for her grandfathers funeral, recieving the phone call when it was completely too late.

Upon meeting the Italian native and realizing he was in her area, she threw all caution to the wind and went for it. He seemed nice enough and if it turned out he wasn't, then she trusted herself to take care of what needed to be if such an occasion should arise.

Florence was only a few miles away, and James was locked in his room doing something, so she left a note on the kitchen table if he happened to come out telling him where she was and that she had her cell phone on and ducked out.

Once she arrived at Noir, she glanced around, wondering if any of the outside patrons would be him and when none of them struck her as the man she spoke with online, she slipped inside and glanced around at the bar. 

Moving to the bar, she checked out the men and her eyes instantly fell on him.

'You the mystery man meeting a mysterious bella?' she grinned, leaning her cigarette into the already ignited flame from his lighter.

Well to say that Zee and I are surprised is the understatement of the year. She's been so quietly violent in my head for the past coupla few weeks that I figured everyone might have forgotten about her. That obviously isn't the case since we were told she scooped 4 wins in the first arpea_awards